The Apprentice kicked up a gear last night and showed that it may even compete with the first series after a disappointing second. There were good quantities of incompetence, bad pitching and jargon ("ideation" anyone?). Ifti got fired because he didn't "bring it to the table" - a product design specialist who failed to suggest any product design in the challenge. But then, THEN, Sir Alan said he was firing another member of Eclipse. Who would it be? Rory - the bumbling poshboy and ineffectual leader - or Trey - the most irritating, loudmouthed, insubordinate apprentice of them all? If Rory had defended himself by saying, "I spent so long arguing with this little twerp I couldn't focus on the task" he would have been saved, but instead he said "Erm...errr....Sir Alan...it was er... horrible...erm", and the bigwig had no choice but to get rid of him. Or did he? Did Sir Alan keep on someone who will definitely get the boot later because the series thrives on the Sairas and Syeds who make the thing (un)watchable? I rather think the second. Trey is so annoying, so confrontational, so very punchable, he's what The Apprentice is all about.
Then I watched Deadline which held much promise. A bunch of celebs (if you can include Chris Parker and Imogen Lloyd-Webber in such a description) have to produce a 12 page celeb insert for 'Closer' each week, under the terrifying eye of Janet Street-Porter. Now I know JSP is responsible for the downfall of Snub TV in the 80s, one of the best things ever on British television, which she replaced with her boyfriend's derisory Normski's House Party, but it was a long time ago, and I do admire her strong will, intelligence and ginormous teeth. And I also appreciate Lisa I'Anson being dressed down by anyone because she's thick, superficial and arrogant, a particularly hateful combination in my book. She's also a starfucker. Every time a name came up, Naomi Campbell being the most notable instance, I'Anson would say in her affected drawl, "Oh, ya, Naomi, I know her, I'll give her a call". Yeah, right, you once got coked off your tits in The Metro and chewed her ear off about how great you both were more like it. Hilarious to see her trying to back track once it has slipped out her gob. One to watch.
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